… explore the possibilities
Other things to read on this topic…
Read the ideas behind the book:               Letters that Talk
We can be passionate about something we believe  all our lives, but others will never know what you’re thinking until you say it. However, expressing something doesn’t mean you will be heard either. 
Stan wasn’t a man gifted with putting words together. In fact, even the thoughts struggled to find their way through his vocal cords and into the air. In his heart, he usually knew what he felt about something, but when standing in front of someone, the words would evaporate like a foolish man’s money. It probably didn’t really matter most of the time, but being a dad and having to raise a teenage boy, meant there were often things that really needed to be said. Like most other things, they just went unsaid. Teenagers however, need to hear certain things from their parents, especially at critical times in their developing years, which happens to be all of the time. Things like, how important they are, words of encouragement, words of guidance, words of affirmation and words that say, ‘I really care about you’. When we don’t hear certain things from one another, we can assume that we are not getting things right, the course of action we are taking is right even though it maybe not the best, or worst of all, that we’re not worth talking to. It was only after Jarred left home at the age of seventeen, that Stan fully realized it was too late and that the things he wished he had said, were no longer worth saying. The father son relationship never ever improved.

You’re not alone

Is this a scenario that sounds familiar? Do you relate to the experience of not being able to say to someone, what you’d really like to say? It might surprise you to discover that it’s a wide-spread phenomena world wide. It affects all types of people, of all ages and all ranks of position. In the book, Crucial Conversations, by Patterson, there are numerous stories of managers, supervisors and employees who are unable to talk about critical information in the workplace.   It’s no different amongst friends, relatives or in our own homes.

Communication blockages

Amongst the many reasons we can’t say what we want to say, is the problems of not being heard. Either we are shouted  down, told we are wrong, or just plain ignored. The problem with being told we are wrong, is that we tend to lose or give up on our own beliefs. Before long we give up on having our own sense of self, after all, the life we are living is basically what someone else believes is right. But there is a way of being heard. In the book Letters that Talk, you will find simple techniques and principles that if followed, can lead to your message finally getting a hearing.

Thinking and saying are not

the same thing.